Is there someone in your life you are attracted to, but you don’t want to come off as too available? Do you feel you need to take a break from your current relationship? Are you trying to ignore a certain person so you can get their attention?
In this article I will share seven tips you can follow when you want to ignore someone you love. Some have to do with your mindset and attitude; some are very practical. Without further ado, let’s get started.
1. Don’t be needy
If you want to ignore someone you love, you have to work on your mindset first. Though you don’t want to completely suppress your thoughts about them, you do need to be as emotionally detached as possible.
When you are needy, not only does it show — it also puts you in a negative state where you can’t be spontaneous and you keep thinking about the other person. You must realize how important your time and energy are, and decide that you will not spend them thinking about this particular person (at least not all the time).
Ultimately, the way you feel affects your actions, so if you are needy, it will be impossible to take a break and ignore the other person. If you find it difficult to be independent and confident, all you need to do is remind yourself that you are the most important person in your life, and that you shouldn’t depend emotionally on anyone. If you want, you can even practice affirmations.
2. Think before you act
When you experience intense emotions, you are more likely to act instantly and be impulsive, regardless of your personality type. So if you love someone and you have decided to temporarily ignore them, it’s vital that you learn to think before you act.
This applies to the words you use when you talk to the other person, your text messages, the places you go to, and so on. If you develop the habit to slow down and wait a few seconds before you do something, you’ll find it a lot easier to maintain self-control when dealing with someone you love.
If you are reading this article, chances are that part of you wants to connect with them, and part of you doesn’t: there is tension, and you have mixed feelings. So take your time, and think before you act.
3. Take breaks from social media
Perhaps you have decided not to engage with someone in real life, but what about social media? What about all those times you check your phone or laptop?
If you are serious about ignoring someone you love, you must pay attention to how you use social media. Though there is no need to block the other person, or stop using social media altogether — you do have to be selective with the content you see online.
The way you do this completely depends on how you want to ignore them. Perhaps so far you have been replying to all their texts instantly, so all you need to do right now is wait a little bit longer and stop being available 24/7. Perhaps so far you have been checking their profile non-stop, and you simply need to take a break.
4. Spend time on the things you enjoy
If you want to ignore someone you love, the worst thing you can do is spend time alone doing nothing. When you are inactive, your mind is more likely to come up with an endless stream of thoughts about the other person and why you totally need them.
So direct your focus to the activities you enjoy; cultivate relaxing hobbies that absorb you; immerse yourself in a new book; engage in self-care. Whatever you do, make sure it makes you feel good about yourself and it doesn’t remind you of the other person.
Spending more time on the things you enjoy improves your self-esteem and confidence, and keeps your mind busy in a positive way. Conversely, being inactive could make you feel lonely, or depressed.
5. Don’t overdo it
There are many different reasons why you may want to detach from someone temporarily. If you have decided to ignore someone you love to simply attract them to you, then my advice would be to do it sometimes — not all the time.
Your goal in this case isn’t to ghost the other person, but to make them realize you may not be available all the time. You want them to know that even though you like them, you still put yourself first. You want them to know that you don’t depend on them emotionally, because that would come off as unattractive.
If so far you have given them the impression that you’re too available, then all you need to do is… stop being too available. It’s that simple. If you want, you can even pretend to be “too busy” to see him or her from time to time. But, again, don’t ghost them completely.
6. Avoid the places they go to
Just like it’s important to take breaks from social media, it’s equally important that you avoid spending too much time in the places the other person usually visits.
Though you may have learned to appear reserved and detached even when you see them in person, it would be best to avoid them when possible. Your rational mind may think you can see the other person and pretend you don’t care, but that’s not how your subconscious works.
Your subconscious will still bombard you with thoughts and feelings about them, and chances are that you’ll find it difficult to behave the way you want to.
7. Maintain a positive attitude
The seventh and final tip to ignore someone you love is to maintain a positive attitude, always. This applies to both when you interact with the other person, and when you are on your own.
When you see them, be polite. It’s okay if you don’t want to smile, but don’t be rude, and treat them as you would treat someone you respect. When you are alone, spend time on the things you enjoy (as we’ve seen earlier) because it boosts your confidence and sense of self-worth.
Whatever your plan is, a positive attitude will always go a long way.
How to ignore someone you love: summary
To recap:
- Don’t be needy; you are the most important person in your life
- Think before you act as it makes it easier to maintain self-control
- Stop checking their social media profile all the time
- Spend more time on the things you enjoy: it improves your self-esteem
- Be less available, but don’t completely ghost the other person
- Avoid the places they visit: it would be best to avoid them when possible
- Maintain a positive attitude both when you meet them and when alone