Is blocking someone immature or childish?
Although blocking someone can be immature (for example, when it’s a punishment), in general it’s simply a sign that you love yourself and you respect yourself. Especially if the other person is abusive. In a way, blocking someone can actually be a sign of maturity.
Keep reading to find out whether you should block or simply ignore someone, when blocking someone is immature, and the four signs it’s time to block someone.
Is it better to block or ignore?
By blocking someone, you send a very clear message; you end all contact.
If done suddenly, and without any previous signs, the person who’s being blocked may see it as a very harsh way to say goodbye.
But the truth is that most of the time there are plenty of signs — it’s just that the other person doesn’t pick them up, possibly because you’re not on the same wavelength.
Now, is it better to block someone… or simply ignore them?
Personally, I believe blocking or ghosting is usually the best way. That is, if you’ve realized the other person is toxic or manipulative and you’re done.
Why? Because blocking gives you the power to avoid any type of toxic confrontation. No drama, no gaslighting, no unnecessary anger or stress.
With some people, the more you try to talk to them, the more insidious they’ll become. Blocking allows you to cut them out of your life instantly.
Now, ignoring, on the other hand, is the better option if you’ve decided to take a break and see things from a different perspective.
And ignoring someone doesn’t usually lead to anything permanent; nor is it usually interpreted as permanent.
In a nutshell: if the other person is truly toxic, I’d say just block them and respect yourself. It’s easier and faster. Ignoring gives you time to think and it’s not as harsh.
Here’s when blocking is immature
I can think of two scenarios in which blocking someone is actually immature. The first one is the most common.
- To punish the other person
- To avoid criticism
Blocking as a form of punishment is almost always immature. Or at least it shows lack of self-awareness. Why?
Because that’s the same as holding grudges. Why would you use your (precious) time and energy to focus on the person or people who hurt you?
The best thing is to simply move on. And forgive, or forget, depending on the situation.
By moving on, you’re doing yourself a massive favor. You are taking care of your mental health. You are protecting your energy rather than wasting it on the same exact person who made your life hell.
So my advice is: never block someone as a form of punishment. It really is childish.
And if you are blocked as a punishment, then chances are the person who blocked you is immature. At best. At worst, they are manipulative.
Now, here’s the second scenario. If you block someone to avoid constructive, healthy criticism, or simply out of insecurity, then that’s immature as well.
You can’t just block or ghost someone just because you don’t like their behavior, or because you’re inflexible and think they shouldn’t have done or said that thing.
Abuse and toxic criticism are, of course, a valid reason to block someone. But when it comes to criticism in general, you can’t be inflexible.
Welcoming criticism and being willing to talk about issues in your relationship is actually a sign of maturity and confidence.
Being vulnerable is also a sign of maturity. When you’re too rigid, or inflexible, you can’t be vulnerable, and you are resisting growth.
Self-care isn’t immaturity
When blocking the other person becomes the only option, at least the only option if you care about your own mental health — then it’s not immature at all.
You don’t have to deal with toxic people. And you shouldn’t feel guilty for avoiding or blocking toxic people. It’s that simple.
If there is someone who constantly drains you, or makes you feel like a bad person, or tries to manipulate or use you, then blocking really is a form of self-care.
By blocking energy vampires, you are basically telling yourself: I don’t deserve this; I care about my health, and I love myself. That’s powerful.
Signs you should block someone
Are you thinking about blocking someone or cutting them off for good? Here are four signs you want to pay attention to.
This is, obviously, unacceptable behavior.
But it’s not always that obvious if the other person is manipulative and becomes aggressive gradually, over time.
One example is a narcissist who abuses their partner after the love bombing phase.
You want to be very clear about what counts as unacceptable behavior. And realize that no matter how angry or frustrated the other person may feel, there are things that they simply cannot do.
If you are ever abused, in any way, it’s time to block the other person and move on.
2. Their behavior doesn’t change
Here is another important sign you may need to block or ghost someone.
Have you already talked to them? Have you tried to set boundaries, explain why or how they hurt you — countless times? Yet the other person simply won’t change?
Regardless of their personality, this isn’t healthy. It’s not healthy for you, and it’s not healthy for them.
If you’re stuck in the same situation because the other person simply won’t change, ask yourself whether it’s worth it to stay on the same path.
3. They are intrusive
Whether it’s intrusive phone calls, text messages, questions — anything that makes you feel uncomfortable could be a red flag.
The other person doesn’t have the right to be intrusive. Nor do they have the right to try and control you.
Clear boundaries are one of the foundations of healthy relationships.
If the other person doesn’t accept any boundaries (because they’re needy, or because they don’t value your time, or because they are control freaks), then blocking them could be a good decision.
4. You feel drained
Lastly, you want to pay attention to your own feelings.
Does the other person or group of people drain you (you can check the eight most common signs here)? Then it may be time to block them.
When you are honest with yourself, and when you are in touch with your own emotions and feelings, it’s surprisingly easy to determine who’s right for you and who isn’t.
Feeling drained all the time (or whenever you meet or talk to the other person) definitely isn’t normal.
If you’re not sure whether it really is the other person, then try to take a break. But if it’s definitely them, you have the right to block them — it’s not immature.
In today’s world, we interact with others virtually almost as much as we do offline.
Not just with phone calls — think of text messages, Instagram posts, and social media in general.
In general, this is a good thing. But it also means that to say goodbye to someone, the act of avoiding them offline isn’t enough.
Sometimes you need to block them as well.
As explained, there are two situations in which blocking someone is a sign of immaturity: when it’s a form of punishment, and when it’s done to avoid healthy criticism.
But is blocking toxic people immature? Absolutely not. And you have every right in the world to do so.
If you prioritize your mental health (you should), and there are toxic, abusive, manipulative people in your life — blocking them may be inevitable.
I respectfully disagree that ghosting and blocking someone like they are less than human is a good way to end a friendship or relationship with someone even if they have some unhealthy behaviours that I acknowledge the person should work to try and correct..
I have been in the receiving end of someone who ghosted me because I became too needy and extremely emotionally attached after he’d been complimenting me alot and made me feel like he cared..Was that fair?? I don’t think so..
The pain of being cut off like that has been EXTREME..
Things are not always black and white and it’s more likely that both people contribute to the demise of a friendship or relationship..
Alot of people are quick to just label the other person toxic and block someone like they never existed without closure of any kind not caring about the psychological damage it can cause the other person..
thank you for your comment. I am sorry that you have gone through “the pain of being cut off” especially since you describe it as extreme and unnecessary.
I agree that some tend to label others toxic purely because it’s the easiest decision, however this article refers to victims of actually toxic individuals (narcissists, manipulators, or extremely selfish people in general).
This article was written to basically give them permission to ignore, block, and detach from anyone who deliberately makes their life miserable — without overthinking too much.
This certainly doesn’t apply to all situations and I do realize some parts may give the idea that one is allowed to block anyone who is intrusive or needy instantly and without taking into consideration their feelings, which is obviously wrong.
I periodically review all articles with the most views, this is one of them and when I do update it I will try to answer the question of the title from a broader perspective.
I think there’s a couple other instances when it’s ok to block someone. At least I hope so, because those are the situations I’ve found myself in. If you know that the other person is stringing you along or that you really shouldnt be together but you don’t yet have the self control to ignore them because of your genuine feelings OR you know that you’ll drive yourself crazy hoping they’ll contact you. It’s better to take away the option of constantly checking your phone and being disappointed when they dont text-and removing the option to respond if they DO text.
I agree, that’s what has helped my sanity after my most recent breakup of over 2 yrs. together. He is an introvert as well but never seemed that way around me, I digress. After he let me go within 45mins he sent me a text message and a link (something to with business). I looked at it later on that day and gave it a thumbs up.(I probably shouldn’t have responded as I now think it was a test from him to see if I would respond) I kept checking my phone, text message and WhatsApp after that it drove me crazy, feeling if anxiousness with some false hope he would text 🤔 again but after hours of checking I realized I was hurting myself and my mental state so the best thing for me to do was to block him on the phone, text and WhatApp and it helped. He must have figured it out that I block him because 2 1/2 days later he blocked/delete my number. I don’t know why but I started laughing when I figured it out because the irony is I never contacted him after we broke up as I started focusing on myself which he told me to do. Anyway I think it’s best to delete a person from your contacts or block them for reasons of sanity. My only problem is he has my stuff at his place so eventually I’ll need to find a way to contact him
( hopefully he doesn’t give it away or burn them) Lol.