You attract what you fear because your mind manifests its most recurrent thoughts and images — good or bad. You also attract what you fear because unconsciously you may have a strong desire to face your fears.
Spiritually, there are many reasons why you may attract what you fear or dislike. For example, it could be a form of precognition, or it may be a “demon”, or “balancing forces”.
Ever wondered why the more we fear something, the more we tend to attract it and see it in our life?
And then as soon as our fear disappears, the thing that used to terrify us and drain our energy seems to disappear, too?
It’s not magic. It’s not a coincidence, either.
You attract what you fear, here’s why
1. The mind’s language
Alright, let’s start with the basics. You probably already know this. There are parts of your mind that don’t really understand negation.
Whereas the conscious can perfectly differentiate between, say, positive or negative, do or do not, have or have not, the unconscious has no idea what that means.
The first reason we tend to attract what we fear is that as long as someone or something is in our mind, we will naturally manifest it in our reality.
2. Feelings > thoughts
Thoughts can generate feelings… and vice versa. However, feelings are usually much more intense than thoughts. Especially the feelings triggered by fear.
Each time you are afraid, your whole body changes, so the mind registers all the symptoms and “learns” that this thing you are afraid of must be really important.
The actual danger associated with the thing you fear may be zero, but once your feelings get registered, the mind will invest all its energy trying to fight or avoid it. Which doesn’t usually work, because of…
3. Balancing forces
This may blow your mind or leave you skeptical. According to Reality Transurfing, there are many natural forces that influence our reality, yet we aren’t always aware of them.
Specifically when it comes to fear, balancing forces tend to appear. Fear generates an imbalance in the energy field, so the forces will try to restore the original balance.
Though one way to do that is to remove the object of your fear, this isn’t always possible. So what usually happens is, the forces will… somehow force you to face your fears.
4. Fear turns into desire
Perhaps there is no need for weird spiritual theories to explain why we attract our fears so often. Perhaps it’s not a mysterious force, but rather our psyche.
Think: isn’t fear… desire? When you are afraid of something, you feel very strong emotions, and you naturally want (desire) them to end; you want to be liberated by the fear.
So unconsciously, you may know that the only way to do that is to, again, face your fears. So instead of pushing away the fear, you attract it. Or dream about it (this is a relatively common theme/explanation in Freud’s book).
5. Fear feeds demons
If we approach reality from the spiritual perspective, then the material world isn’t all there is. There are other planes, or dimensions, which can influence our behavior in ways we would never suspect.
Fear — especially intense fear — is a colossal waste of energy. The more you are afraid, the more energy you will lose. However, your energy doesn’t necessarily just “disappear”.
Spiritually, there are parasitic entities, usually referred to as demons, that feed off your energy, and that will do anything they can to make sure your fear comes back over and over again as it is a very efficient way to eat your energy up.
Other reasons you can attract what you fear
6. Acting out of fear
This has been one of my most profound (and perhaps most depressing) realizations since my spiritual awakening. Why do we do what we do, why do we think what we think?
Once you look at the world with a different perspective, it turns out that some of the habits/activities we think we love, we actually have/do purely out of fear. For example…
Work because we fear poverty; socialize and get drunk because we fear solitude; copy others because we fear their opinions. Instead of consciously asking what truly makes us happy, we often act out of (and therefore attract) fear.
7. The pessimism bias
Perhaps you have a tendency to dwell on what doesn’t work, what you don’t like etc? As we’ve seen, our mind doesn’t really distinguish between positive or negative.
And what’s scary is, because we only see what we want to see (in other words, see the side of reality that we actively focus on), what’s in your mind will be in your world too.
In reality, you may attract all kinds of wonderful things in your life! And also attract a tiny percentage of the things you fear or dislike. But if you only focus on those, they will magically “be everywhere”.
8. Lack of emotions
No one wants to live a boring, gray, uninteresting life. Yet sometimes that’s what we perceive our existence to be (even though it’s probably not).
What happens as a result, then, is that we unconsciously engage in activities that naturally trigger very strong emotions, even if negative and/or unpleasant.
Why? Because, again, the unconscious is only looking for a “high”; blissful or terrifying, doesn’t matter. This is why things like horror movies or shock sites are a thing.
9. Fear dominates your life
The ninth potential reason you may attract what you fear is that the emotion of fear was designed to actually dominate your life, not even spiritually, but practically.
It has to do with evolution and survival. We take survival for granted now, but what about thousands of years ago? Wild beasts, natural disasters, poisonous plants, extreme temperatures etc.
These used to be actual threats (they still are, we just learned more efficient ways to avoid them) so our brains have prioritized identifying and fighting them.
Though I doubt any scientific study will ever prove things like retrocausality and precognition, there is some evidence that precognition is actually a thing.
For example, precognitive dreams. I’ve had many, maybe you’ve had a few too. If we do have the ability to somehow “sense” that a bad experience is coming, perhaps we will react to that experience in advance.
This may explain why we often attract what we fear. If a negative event in the future is already set, then our fear of it is nothing but our body/mind reacting to our precognition.
Three tips to stop attracting what you fear
- Picture the worst case scenario. Seriously, what would the worst case scenario imply? By learning to be okay with e.g. failure or disappointment, you automatically remove all the unnecessary tension linked to the fear.
- Write down your fears. To identify and get clear on what it is that you fear, thinking is not enough — write down your fears. This will bring them to the conscious level, which means they won’t be as scary.
- Focus on the positive. Even during meditative practices, it’s hard to just stop the stream of thoughts. The good news is, you don’t have to. It’s enough to simply direct your focus toward the positive — happy, inspiring, empowering thoughts.